Hey everyone! As many of you know, my book, Powered by Happy, will be coming out in March 2010. I wanted to create a blog to start the dialogue on topics related to how happiness can boost your performance, increase success and transform your workday! I want to spread the word about the passion I have around this topic and learn from all of you, how happiness has helped change your career and your life!
Let me start by sharing with you an impactful story from my life, that helped change my career AND my happiness!
I was twenty-nine years old and on the fast track to a great career with an international brokerage firm. I had a loving husband, a beautiful three-year-old daughter, and a great job—talk about having it all! I loved my job. It was perfect for me and for my life, or so I thought. I was in charge of office administration, accounting, sales, and computer training and support. Sounds like a lot, but I loved it. It provided a challenge, professional development, and enough diversity that I never got bored. I was able to travel the world and see places that I never dreamed I would see. I worked with executives who were twice my age, three times my seniority level, and earning paychecks worth more than quadruple my dollar value. Again, life was good.
Then one night while traveling in England, I called to wish my three-year-old, Tiffany, a good night, and for the first time since I had her, she realized I was gone, really gone. Up until this point, my travel was her “vacation.” She got to visit her grandmothers and was spoiled beyond belief. But even at three years old, she was getting wise enough to realize that her mom was not there to tuck her in at night. When I spoke with her, she started crying, “Mommy come home! You no here—I need you here!” I was in such shock that I didn’t know how to respond; nothing in my parenting books had taught me what to say or how to react. So I reacted by crying, too. I was devastated. All of a sudden, my perfect job—the job that helped make me happy and fulfilled—was now something that was coming between me and my happiness.
The last three days of my trip seemed to last forever, and I will never forget my trip home. I experienced a life-altering conversation with a complete stranger, a conversation that I live by to this day. I was sitting next to a man who noticed my preoccupation (and depression) and started chatting about being stuck in an airport. Half-listening, I was playing along, and as we bonded, I started to share my story of my distraught three-year-old and how horrible I felt when I heard her cry. Almost abruptly, he stopped me and said, “Listen, you seem like a bright young woman, but at the end of the day, nobody ever says they wished they’d worked more. They say they wished they had spent more time with their family. I hope you remember that as your daughter grows up and someday, very quickly, will be gone away to school and on to her own life.”
Wow. Have I heard this kind of story before? Absolutely. At the exact moment I needed to hear it? Never!Within a month of that conversation, I quit my job. Yes, the job I loved, the one that made me happy every day. However, what “having it all” meant to me had changed, and thank God it did, because my two beautiful girls will tell you that I have been there for them, in sickness and in health, ever since!
Tell me some of changes you have made that ultimately changed your career? your level of happiness? your life?
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Hi Beth,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great start...can't wait to see more.
Denise Power (from waaaaay back during your days at Limited Brands)
I remember your days at that "dream job"...I was there with you but my position wasn't my dream job. It was my first job out of college, and while I cherish the life-long friends and relationships I had made, I quit that job to go back to school. Quitting my job to go back to school only 3 years after graduating with a Bachelor's degree in business sent my parents reeling! I started on a winding road that brought me to my current position of Certified Surgical Assistant - a far cry from working in an office. What I realized was that "pusing paper" didn't fulfill me. Sure it was a fun job in a fun setting with fun people, but what was I contributing? Did my job matter to others on a personal level? Did it matter to me? Did it make me whole? No, no, and no were all I came up with for answers. So, I went back to school for Surgical Technology which opened the door for me to transfer schools and move to become a Certified Surgical Assistant. I come home at the end of my work days feeling as if I have made a difference in someones life at their most dire and often desperate time.
ReplyDeleteIn our time of "immediate gratification", I've got it made. I directly reap the positive effects of my personal interactions, and conversely, immediately reap the negative. Both experiences keep me growing and learning how my visage, my approach, my compassion, my passion, and my whole presentation effect my patients and their outcomes.
Happiness comes from balance, however. I am blessed to work 3 days a week leaving free time to spend with my 2 1/2 yr old daughter. The balance of work and family brings the whole picture into a happy focus.
Blessings Beth on this glorious venture!
Sue
Sue - Thanks so much for sharing your wonderful story. One thing I have learned is long term sustainable happiness comes from true balance in your life and helping others. You DO have it made!
ReplyDeleteWow Beth, I love your story, you have always been an amazing lady to me and you continue to be with this wonderful story! Thanks for sharing! This I did not know about you.
ReplyDeleteYou know that I was born with the gift of joy; God has truly blessed me with this gift that I continue to carry and to use for not only me, but for everyone around me. I have recognized this gift of happiness for as long as I can remember. Although life has dealt me some harsh blows, somehow I have maintained the same level of joy in my heart. My dad would say it's the Holy Spirit. He's right.
I do have my down moments, but during those times, I tell myself "tomorrow is a new day, get through this and all will be well again soon". With one divorce, two marriages, two babies who died, two boys who live today (13 and 10), the deaths of too many friends, the heartbreak of betrayal by a best friend and other typical life things that just "happen"; I continue to have a joy in my heart. I know it comes from my faith, it comes from my happy childhood, it comes from having some absolutely terrific friends and family.
However, one thing that I believe helps me today was my decision to stay home while the boys were babies. During those years I continued to volunteer, to help others who could not help themselves, and to be there every step of the way for my husband and sons.
Interestingly though, had I not had my career before my family, I don't know if I would have done as good a job as I have these past 14 years. My career somehow prepared me for my job as wife and mother, as strange as that sounds.
Now the time has come for me to once again reenter my career life. I can feel that my family is ready, as am I. With these new (domestic) skills another layer of foundation has been formed to secure something that will benefit everyone all the way around.
Sharing my gift of happiness is what I do best, just like you Beth. It's why and how we are successful with not just our careers, but also our lives.
Life is too short to not share Happiness every day and every moment possilbe!
May God Bless you Beth and may this next chapter in your life be filled with good stuff!
Much Love,
Gayle Marie
Gayle - Thanks for sharing! What a beautiful story and I KNOW that you have the Holy Spirit within you and have had "joy in your heart" - at least all the years I have known you. Thank you for your kind words and well wishes! You are the best!
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